Scrutinization of a Beloved Fairy Tale

Over the past 11 days I’ve a lot of blog ideas and even created some doodles to go along with them.  However I have not had the time nor motivation to do so…. Just like everything else in life.............Anywho, I figured I ought to get back on everything I’ve neglected starting with this and a load of laundry (bleh stupid laundry in its stupid orange basket. mocking me with its dirtiness….) So today’s subject: RAPUNZEL (please note that if you haven't heard this story before, this entire article won't make sense) The story of a beautiful girl locked in a tower with really really really long hair. it doesn't make sense. Our story begins with a couple expecting their first child, when, just like every other pregnant woman on Earth, the wife starts craving random things, among them is rapunzel.  So the husband sneaks into a witch's garden to steal some. Alright so is the market too far away? Is the only rapunzel to be found in the whole wide world in that garden?  Is that rapunzel so special that the wife can't possibly have any other rapunzel but the rapunzel from the witch's garden?  Can they not afford rapunzel (in which case, it's probably not such a good idea to have a baby)? ...juuuuuuusssst sayin..... Next, what if Rapunzel was a boy?  How would that work?  Rapunzel got her name because of how exactly she came into the possession of the witch.  Would her name still be Rapunzel had she been a boy?  I don't know.  When the witch locks him in the tower would Boypunzel still have to grow out his hair.  Would he be embarrassed by that or does he not know the length of most men's hair....**tee-hee they would call him Gaypunzel if he was ever exposed to the real world, poor lad. Speaking of which, whatever gender this character is, (which i suppose is irrelevant considering, Rapunzel is a girl period) is it entirely necessary for them to grow out their hair so the witch can climb it? How did Rapunzel get up there in the first place?  Couldn't the witch use the same method to get into the tower rather than making the poor girl having to grow out her hair just to be used to be used as a rope? (what's a tower doing in the forest?) Also the witch is dressed like a nun.  why? Star Wars Fan Anyone?    I rest my case.